Zwierzalnia – April 24, 2020

Life can be crazy sometimes. It’s a common fact of life. We may not know a lot of things as we venture into the world that is our future, but one thing’s for certain. Nobody’s perfect. We all make mistakes. Some are borderline embarrassing, while others are straight up hilarious. Share with us your crazy/funny stories! We know you want to!

New stories will be published on Fridays.


MOJE CZY PSA?

Kilka miesięcy temu pojechałam z mamą i z naszym psem do weterynarza. Weterynarz musiał oczywiście go zbadać ale zanim do tego doszło trzeba było się stawić w recepcji by potwierdzić niektóre informacje. Nasz czworonożny przyjaciel już zaczął ciągnąć moją mamę w stronę wyjścia (bo w jego przypadku nie przepada bardzo za tym miejscem) więc trudno było jej się skupić na tym co mówiła pani recepcjonistka. Ku mojemu zaskoczeniu moja mama bardzo dobrze odpowiadała na pytania, biorąc pod uwagę że nasz pies nie dawał za wygraną, ale kiedy recepcjonistka poprosiła o potwierdzenie nazwiska moja mama bez wahania zapytała się: “Ale moje czy psa?” Kiedy zobaczyłam reakcje recepcjonistki wybuchłam głośnym śmiechem a moja mama dopiero po kilkunastu sekundach zdała sobie sprawę co powiedziała.


DENTIST OR A THERAPIST?

I worked as a receptionist at the dental office for about a year, so naturally I saw a lot of people and heard a lot of crazy stories. This one however is probably the most cringiest. That day I had to call a few patients to remind them that they should come for their regular checkups soon. One guy in particular was already few months behind because he was always super busy to schedule a proper meeting. However, when I called him that particular time he told me that he was free that day, so he asked me if it would be possible for him to come. His voice sounded a little bit off (almost as if he were crying before he picked up the phone) but I did not think too much of it.  It was not a busy day by all means, so told him that I see no issue with him coming over that day. He arrived a couple of hours later and was let in almost right away because his dentist was almost done with his patient. When he entered the dentist room his dentist decided to leave the door open as it was really stuffy and there were no more patients in the waiting room. So consequently, I pretty much heard everything that was going on in there because the reception desk was literally near the dentist room. When the patient was trying to make himself comfortable in the chair, I heard the dentist say: “Okay, open up.” To that the patient replied: “My wife left me two weeks ago.” Now, I finally realized why he sounded so sad over the phone. I felt bad for him but I could not help but cringe, Why would you tell your dentist that?! That’s obviously not what he meant! To make things even more cringy for about five seconds there was total silence before the dentist awkwardly replied: “I’m sorry to hear that, but I meant your mouth.” I could hear the patient go: “Oh.” and I literally clenched my jaw because I could feel the sheer awkwardness in the room.


CURFEW FOR BOYFRIENDS

Some time ago, back in the days of my super serious teenage relationship, I was at my girlfriend’s place. Just for the record, we were around 15 at the time. It was an evening, around 8-9PM. We were just hanging out, watching TV or something equally trivial. I remember her mother walking around with a face that could kill. The basilisk’s eyes were ready to seal the fate of whatever poor soul got in her way. I honestly did not know what’s going on, but then again, I did not see much of her before, so for all I knew it could have been her default settings. Soon enough, I got downstairs, and I started getting ready to leave. My girlfriend went back upstairs before I left the house. When she got there, I could hear the mother explode. The dam has been broken, the torrent of words unleashed. I could somewhat expect that this was coming, but I did not expect them to be targeted at me. Apparently it was unthinkable for me to be spending time this late in the evening at their place. I got dressed and left, feeling more confusion than shame to be honest. There were so many ways for her to handle this situation, but she chose the most awkward. I can’t remember spending much time there afterwards. But if I were to go there, at least now I knew to avoid ungodly hours.