Zwierzalnia – May 01, 2020

Life can be crazy sometimes. It’s a common fact of life. We may not know a lot of things as we venture into the world that is our future, but one thing’s for certain. Nobody’s perfect. We all make mistakes. Some are borderline embarrassing, while others are straight up hilarious. Share with us your crazy/funny stories! We know you want to!

New stories will be published on Fridays.


SKIPPING SCHOOL

I am a high school teacher and one day my girlfriend and I decided that we needed a break. We were very busy back then so, as you can probably imagine, we did not spend a lot of time together. We both notified our higher ups and told them a white lie that we were feeling a bit under the weather. They were very understanding and told us to get better soon. I honestly felt a little bit guilty that we were lying to them but as I said before, we desperately needed a day off. After everything was sorted out we got in my car and drove to a nearby park that had a nice lake. It was a lovely sunny day so we basked in the sun, held hands and exchanged funny anecdotes. When we decided to change route to my surprise I noticed one of my students throwing pebbles in water. He noticed me staring at him so we both kind of nodded at each other. It only took us a few seconds to freeze in place as we both realized that we were skipping school. When I returned the next day and spotted him in the school corridor I embarrassingly turned around before he saw me and bolted. He never mentioned this incident to me when we were in class and for that I am very grateful.  


UCZ SIĘ UCZ, BO NAUKA TO POTĘGI KLUCZ

Kiedy miałem 14 lat dostałem szlaban na wychodzenie z domu bo nie przyłożyłem się do nauki. Oczywiście nie mogłem też nikogo zapraszać do siebie ale pewnego dnia moi rodzice zostali gdzieś zaproszeni. Przed wyjściem ostrzegli mnie żebym nikogo nie sprowadzał do domu i że mam się pilnie uczyć. Kiedy już odjechali, poczekałem z 15 minut i zadzwoniłem do kolegi który mieszkał niedaleko żeby do mnie przyszedł bo się nudziłem a rodzice gdzieś sobie pojechali. Graliśmy sobie na konsoli ale przerwał nam grę sms mojej mamy. Poprosiła mnie bym wysłała jej swoje zdjęcie bo chciała mieć pewność że się uczę. Bez zastanowienia podałem komórkę koledze i poprosiłem go by zrobił mi zdjęcie jak siedzę przy biurku z zeszytami i książkami. Kiedy wysłałem jej zdjęcie ona od razu odpisała: “No bardzo fajnie. Ale powiedz mi KTO ci to zdjęcie zrobił?” W tym momencie poczułem się jak największy idiota, który sam się dał przyłapać.


APPRECIATING THE VIEW

About two years ago I finally managed to move out my parents’ house. The apartment was not fancy by all means, but I could pay my rent, afford groceries and still had some money left in the bank so it was a pretty good deal to me. On the day of moving, my best friend called me and offered to help me out with boxes and unpacking and I was ecstatic because I always appreciated some extra help. When all boxes were finally out of the moving van, I opened a bottle of wine and poured each of us a glass. As we were drinking the wine, a guy whose apartment was directly facing mine, started doing pull ups on a pull up bar that was fitted into his doorway. We had a really nice full view of him from my kitchen window. To top it all off he was also shirtless. Without thinking my best friend whistled and said a little bit too loudly: “I would like some of that, please.” When he met our gaze we stupidly realized that our window was tilted open so he clearly heard my friend’s remark. Funnily enough he actually did not seem to mind and sent us a wink. We quickly managed to shake off our embarrassment after that and started clapping, when he returned to his daily workout, to cheer him on, which he really seemed to appreciate.