Zwierzalnia – July 03, 2020

Life can be crazy sometimes. It’s a common fact of life. We may not know a lot of things as we venture into the world that is our future, but one thing’s for certain. Nobody’s perfect. We all make mistakes. Some are borderline embarrassing, while others are straight up hilarious. Share with us your crazy/funny stories! We know you want to!

New stories will be published on Fridays.


SPEEDING TICKET WARNING

When my brother was 4 years old my parents bought him a drivable mini car for his birthday. That same day they went for a walk around the neighbourhood and as you can expect my brother was very excited by the prospect of going outside because that way he could test out his new birthday gift. The second he got inside his mini car he started to race like crazy. My parents were behind him, keeping a close eye on him but eventually they had to speed walk to catch up with him. Needless to say it wasn’t how they imagined their pleasant family stroll. They started calling after him to slow down but my brother was so entranced by his car that he wasn’t at all interest in what my parents had to say. Then out of the blue a police officer showed up and approached my brother who immediately froze and his mini car came to a halt. He must have noticed that my parents were having a hard time with my brother so he decided to step up. With an authoritative voice he said: “Documents please, young man.” My brother blinked up at him and looked around his mini car. Funnily enough he found a price tag that was still attached to the mini car (right next to the wheel) so he removed it from the wheel and passed it to the police officer. The police officer examined the price tag and with a nod said: “You’re good to go. But if I’ll see you driving this fast again and you won’t listen to you parents I will be forced to give you a speeding ticket. Are we clear?” My brother nodded his head immediately and when the police officer handed him the price tag back, he started driving away but in a comically slow pace to show the police officer that he took his warning to heart. As the police officer was getting ready to cross the street he looked back at my parents and with a smile waved in their direction. My parents who were still very much amused by the entire situation naturally waved back, thankful for his help.



DZIEŃ MATKI

Kiedy byłam mała chciałam zrobić mamie niespodziankę na dzień matki. Wstałam wcześnie rano i zaczęłam jej robić śniadanie do łóżka. Znalazłam jakiś talerz, pokroiłam bułkę (bardzo nierówno) posmarowałam dżemem i położyłam kanapki na tacy. Nagle do głowy wpadł mi pomysł że powinnam także zrobić jej pyszną kawę. Więc wyciągnęłam jej ulubiony kubek, wsypałam trochę kawy, odrobinę cukru i zalałam to wszystko wodą…zimną wodą z kranu. Moi rodzice zawsze mi mówili żebym trzymała się z daleka od kuchenki (za co ich nie winie bo byłam jeszcze głupim dzieckiem które mogło zrobić coś głupiego) więc nie wiedziałam że wodę do kawy zawsze trzeba zagotować. Dumna z siebie, otworzyłam drzwi do sypialni rodziców i obudziłam moją mamę śniadaniem do łóżka. Była bardzo mile zaskoczona moimi nierównymi kanapkami ale kiedy dowiedziała się jak przyrządziłam tą kawę odstawiła ją na bok twierdząc że wypije ją późnej. Możecie się chyba domyślić że za nic nie tknęła tej kawy.



TOOTH FAIRY

My parents wanted me to have a magical childhood so I have been told many many times that characters such as Santa Claus, Easter Bunny and Tooth Fairy were real. So when I lost a tooth one day I was really excited, because I was convinced that a Tooth Fairy would visit me in the night, take my tooth and replace it with a coin. For some reason I didn’t tell my parents that I lost a tooth. I guess I thought it wasn’t really their business to know and the entire transaction should be between me and the Tooth Fairy. That night I went to bed early, placed my tooth under my pillow and tried to fall asleep as quickly as possible, but as you can probably imagine it was really difficult due to my excitement. When I woke up the next morning I immediately checked my pillow but my heart sank to the floor when I saw that my tooth still there and there was no sign of a coin. With tears running down my face I sprinted into the living room where my parents were and claimed that Tooth Fairy clearly doesn’t like me, because she didn’t visit me last night. I still remember my parents looking back at each other and they visibly winced. They knew they messed up big time.